Background
I used to have a close friend. Call that person X. We were very good friends. Let me rephrase that. I supposed we were quite good friends. Most of the time I went out of my way to help X. But then one fine day I realized that it was only me who thought we were great friends. X never considered me as a friend but always showed great care and respect (only in my presence). Without me around X criticized and ridiculed every move of mine. You would ask how I got to know all this, well to say the least, I got good sources. So after my final year I cut out X completely from my life. I think X was fine with that because there was no attempt from that side to know what happened.
The Encounter
Yesterday I was waiting in a long and boring queue for submission of a form for my voter's ID. It was raining pretty heavily. Thankfully we had a roof over us but the number of people there was way too much. Suddenly in the crowd I spotted X. I turned my gaze to avoid that person.
I was drowned in the sound of rain and the frustration of standing in the queue when suddenly a person asked for some help to a girl standing right in front of my. Out of sheer habit of helping people I turned around to help the needy person and to my surprise it was X standing there.
BANG!!! A boom went inside my head. That feeling of awkwardness was terrible. I wanted to blurt out all the horrible feelings I had right in front of X's face. But you know what I did? I helped X by giving the directions to get the work done. Obviously X didn't thank me. It was as if I didn't exist there. Only my voice came from somewhere into X's head and gave to solution to the problem. X spoke to that girl for some more seconds and disappeared again in the crowd leaving me feeling stupid. Why did I have to turn around? And even if I did why did I have to open my silly mouth when I knew no one was talking to me? Stupid me. I went back home disgusted.
I always wonder some things in life like, Why do I have to always hide my anguish? Why do I have to be disturbed because of people who hurt me in the past? Why is it difficult to find friends who aren't back stabbers?
I believe things done in your past always haunts you, especially the bad ones, no matter how much you try to get rid of it but I believe this is something called Life.
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About Me
- Suheil Karkera
- Describing myself is the most confusing task ever. I have many forms. I have been the biggest prankster at school and also the most serious thinker at college. I was the carefree,I-dont-give-a-damn attitude guy and also the most caring and loving person. I have been the rock solid emotionless freak and also the crying baby in my mother's arms. Life has metamorphosed me into various forms and would continue to do it. All that is original about me is my heart which would never change. Sorry I cannot describe it as it is far too complex. All you need to know about me is I am Suheil Karkera
4 comments:
I just couldnt stop myself from posting a comment on this.... U have always been a great person and i just truly hope that u never have any such people like X in ur life... I could have been one of the Xs in ur life, but thankfully I realised things, for better, on right time.
Hey there, just thought I'd say Hi to a fellow blogger. Although I must admit, you're filling up your space faster than me :)
You have no idea who this is, do you?
Wow, I'm impressed. But I guess the clues in the first post helped you eh?
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